One for Draco
by White Myth
Summary: Harry is tormented after the war, dreams of death won't leave him, and now that Draco is going there is no one left for Harry to love. Slash, HP/DM.
1. Chapter 1

Harry supposed he had always loved Draco, it was just one of those things where you didn't know where it changed, where he stopped seeing the steely eyed impudent boy who mocked him and started seeing someone greater. Doubtless people would shun him, not once had he shown himself as gay, not once did he show he cared for the blond, but it was true. And yearning for someone who hates you is possible, it just _hurts_. He looked up at the castle in front of him, there were many places he could have gone, he had considered Godric's Hollow, where it all began, but if he were being honest with himself, he knew he could not truly remember that time, he could have gone to Privett Drive, but it held no meaning for him either, and so he had gone to the Dark forest, where he first saw _Voldemort,_ and where he defeated him. Draco was leaving, to go somewhere, Harry didn't know exactly, nor did he care, what was left of his hope was leaving him and so he had made the plan to do this, he had not written a letter, there was no one to write to.

He still remembered every dream that haunted him, they played over and over every night until he feared sleep, he sat on a rock drawing a knife from his robe, he had wanted to do this the way he had known, before magic, before death. He touched the knife point to the top of his arm and deftly slid it across his skin,

 _One for my father ._ It had not hurt as he had expected it to, just a clean sharp sting, the blood that came from his arm was the purest red, like the Gryffindor colours he had been so proud to wear, he moved the knife down by a fraction,

 _One for my mother._ He was crying now, not from the pain.

 _One for Cedric._

 _One for Sirius._

 _One for Dumbledore_

 _One for Dobby._ He winced as the blade sliced over the joint in his elbow,

 _One for Fred_

 _One for Remus_

 _One for Tonks_

 _One for Severus,_ his vision began to dim around the edges and he sighed, relieved as at last he reached his wrist.

 _One for Draco_


	2. Chapter 2

Draco kicked stones out of his way as he walked, what he was doing in the Dark forest he had no idea, something about the forest had drawn him in for many years, a smirk twisted his face, maybe it was just because it was against the rules, then again, he'd only come back the second time to prove he was braver than Saint _Potter_. He still didn't believe that the boy had come back for his seventh year, taking potions at that! His lips formed a subconscious sneer as he thought of the pathetic, scrawny black haired mess that was his rival. Him and his precious little friends, the Golden Trio,

 _Pathetic,_ he thought as he remembered the way people fawned over the boy. Since the war, he had of course considered forgiving the boy for all he had done, knowing now that his father had been a bloody idiot. But why forgive him when he could still taunt him, precious Potter. He looked up and realised he had subconsciously walked to the spot where he had first seen the Dark Lord, the first time he ever entered the forest, in detention and all! He traced the mark that was on his arm, it was no longer the black bold mark it once was, it was now a scar, burned into his flesh, shivering at the memory he looked and saw a black mass huddled in the open space, he crept closer and saw that, it was a bundle of robes, he lightly pushed it and he saw the face of a boy appear in front of him, _the_ boy, he stumbled back,

"Potter!" he hissed at the boy, before realizing that he was unconscious, what had happened here? Draco's eyes widened as he saw the blood surrounding Potter, he tried to locate the source, though he had dreamt of the boy dying, he was not one to let murder happen in front of him, he hadn't even been able to kill Dumbledore for goodness sake! One of Potter's arms fell forward and Draco saw it was covered in multiple cuts all the way down to his wrist,

"Good lord Potter," Draco cursed, pulling out his wand, "What did you do? _Vulnera Sanentur_ _."_ He spoke the words softly waving his wand over the deep cuts on the boys arm, he lifted him and was surprised at how light he was, looking at him now, he realised how gaunt and tired Potter looked, he shoved the thought away and started walking at a fast pace towards the castle, though he would lose part of his reputation, walking into the castle with Potter in his arms, the boy need a blood replenishing potion, the boy groaned in his arms and Draco rolled his eyes,

"Go back to sleep Potter, honestly your luck I was around you great sod." Potter grunted and rolled into Draco's chest, he tried to push the boy away repulsed, but in Potter's case he wasn't sure what he could do safely, sighing exasperated he moved closer to the castle.

Draco stood in the infirmary tapping his arm impatiently, he looked at the professor in front of him, waiting for an answer,

"Well? Why am I still here Professor? I brought Potter hours ago." He rolled his eyes as he thought of the pathetic creature in the bed behind him.

"I believe that Mr Potter will want to thank you for what you have done, I also thought that you would like to know what happened to him, which I'm sure he will tell us when he wakes," the headmistress gave a small smile as she looked over Draco's shoulder, Draco snorted.

"Like I care, I just wasn't going to let the idiot die, OK?" he grumbled, the professor waved a hand at him and turned to leave,

"Inform Madam Pomfrey when he wakes, she will come and find me." And she left, Draco rolled, his eyes, stupid old woman, as if he cared for Potter! He moved over to the boy's bedside and glared at him,

"This is all your fault Potter! Why should I have to put up with you when I could be doing something useful! I haven't got that much longer in this blasted school before the end of the year, and then that's it! I'm leaving for good." Draco felt some kind of sadness fill his heart, he did really love this school, not that he would tell anyone and there was some other emotion as well, like when you forget to do something but you can't think of what it could be, or you know you lost something but you don't know what. That feeling. Some motion made his head snap down to the boy, Potter's eyes were slowly opening, squinting in the light, not wanting to seem like he had been watching Potter, Draco moved away, placing a scowl on his face as Golden boy sat up,

"Steady there Potter, can't have we dying now can we?" he sneered at the bewildered face of his rival, Potter looked down at himself, then looked all around, and Draco saw his face twist into an angry expression, stronger that he had ever seen, Potter remained silent, brow furrowed and shoulders hunched, Draco took a step forward.

"Well? Aren't you going to thank me Potter? I just saved you life!" he sneered and then shivered as Potter sent a glare his way,

"You!" he hissed, "You weren't supposed to save me! Why would you do that?" he groaned, pressing his face into his hands, Draco realised that tears were rolling down Potter's face, "I just wanted to die."

Draco's face flushed, how dare Potter!

"What the actual hell Potter!" his head snapped up, "Why would you want to die? Saint Potter, with all his fame and friends and fan clubs! Are you that arrogant! What do you have to be sad about?" Draco strode forwards practically spitting, he expected the boy who lived to shout back at him, but he just looked up, straight into Draco's eyes,

"I have my reasons," he almost whispered, Draco knew Potter wasn't telling him something, and he was going to find out.


	3. Chapter 3

Harry couldn't sleep that night, his fingers traced the lines on his arm, the last one deeper, by a centimetre or two, he was still alive, and the reason he wanted to be dead was the one who saved him. Draco didn't like him, didn't trust him and didn't understand him. And yet Harry's heart still flipped when he saw him, he still lost sleep over loving someone who should be his enemy. Why had Draco saved him? Maybe, just maybe Draco wasn't as bad as all that, he was a coward, yes, he had been too scared to kill Dumbledore. But he had come back, when Harry came back, Draco had come back to Hogwarts, back to the battle. Harry sighed, maybe he just wanted a reason to make loving Draco acceptable. He pulled off his glasses and pulled the sheets over his head, closing his eyes and frowning, he didn't want the dreams to come, he knew they would, they would always come.

 _Harry woke to a small bed and a tiny closet it was so dark, and the box of the room so tiny, it closed in on him, pushing him in, he reached for the door, gasping for air. He stumbled out into a graveyard, the graveyard, Voldemort in front of him._

" _Weak!" he hissed, "The boy who lived, why is he so weak? Even after I am gone you will still die because of me!" cold evil laughter filled the air and the world spun as Harry saw the faces of those he loved in front of him,_

" _So weak," the all whispered, their faces contorted into disappointed expressions that made Harry choke, "Always needing help, our help, what have you ever done for us?" Harry collapsed, ears ringing until one person crouched in front of him, the sneer not out of place on his face_

" _You don't deserve love."_

* * *

Draco pondered what it was Potter wasn't telling him, sure he was curious; I mean here was Potter, who had everything by the way, asking for death. What else was he supposed to do? Sit around twiddling his thumbs? He was going to have to be discrete, wouldn't do him any good to be seen with the Golden boy, he had decided after some time last night he would visit Potter in the hospital in the morning, before breakfast, if anyone questioned him, well he would just say he had been sent by Professor McGonagall, on account of the whole, Potter tried to kill himself thing. He swaggered down the hall, it really made him gleeful to think that Potter for once was not perfect, was at the bottom. He pushed open the door to the infirmary and saw that the dark haired figure was still in bed, he strolled closer,

"Get up Potter, honestly, you'd think after an experience like that you'd be flouncing about with your pretty little frie..." he stopped dead when he saw the look on the hiss face, saw the way he writhed in pain, tears rolling down his cheeks.

"Potter?" he poked him in the side, he didn't wake, "Wake up you moron," he shook the weeping boy hard until Potter suddenly sat up right in bed. Making Draco jump back, he looked in terror and Draco, tears still pouring down his face. Draco put a mask on, 0he was not about to show Potter how much that had shaken him, in truth that was the second time Draco had ever seen him cry, it scared him.

Slowly, the wide eyed and shaky breathed version of Potter Draco didn't know began to compose himself,

"W-what are you doing here...Malfoy" Draco caught on to the time it took for the boy to say his name, he ignored it,

"McGonagall sent me down, however I'm sure she didn't expect me to find you crying like a baby."

"Lay off it Malfoy, you'll never understand." Potter turned his head away and Draco sneered,

"Then educate me _Potter_ what was that? Some kind of nightmare?" Draco rolled his eyes looking at him, Potter didn't say a thing, he just nodded, head still turned away,

"What..."

"Mr Malfoy!" a shrill voice from behind him cut him off, "I'm so glad you're here, I'd like you to take Mr Potter down to breakfast for me, he is all healed but I think someone need to make sure he doesn't get...sidetracked." the mediwitch smiled sadly, "then Professor McGonagall has requested to see you both in her office, I believe she said that should she show up she has some _peppermint toads_ she'd be willing to give you." But by that point Draco had stopped listening,

"Take _Potter_ to breakfast?" he spluttered, "No! I swear, I just came down to check in because I was told to..." he looked panicked as Potter pulled on his robes and headed towards the doors calmly, Madame Pomfrey pushed him in the same direction, he gulped and followed him out of the doors.

"You don't have to walk with me Malfoy." Potter said calmly, Draco sighed,

"Though I'm sure it will ruin my reputation, I can't be bothered to save you from your suicidal tendencies again." Draco rolled his eyes,

"Then don't!" Potter snapped, "For the love of all that is good Draco don't save me okay?" he walked off leaving Draco stunned, Potter, Potter had just used his name. Why? Draco was going to get to the bottom of this, how, he didn't know, but he had more questions to answer now than yesterday, each of them more puzzling than the next. He started walking towards the Great Hall.

Towards the beginning of the year whenever anyone from their year entered the hall it would cause a ripple of whispered rumors, especially when it came to the Big Three, but ober time things began to settle again and those who had not fought let the battle become a myth, a tall tale that had grown and escalated until it was unbelievable, which of course made Draco the bad guy, but still, that attention wasn't all bad, as he entered the hall he took a glance at Potter who was already sitting, Draco guessed he should really start thinking of him as Harry now, he had called Draco by his name, and seeing as they weren't really _enemies_. He sat down at the Slytherin table, Pansy nudged him,

"Where were you this morning?" she smiled sweetly, "Out for a stroll with your beloved?"

"Shove off Pansy, I told you, I'm not dating anyone!" Draco threw his goblet at her,

"Aww Draco, you've been acting different for days! Like a love sick Hufflepuff, I know there's someone and I'm gonna find out who." She blew him a kiss and turned back to her breakfast, before he could reply something broke out across the hall.

"I told you I'm fine!" Harry yelled, "And even if I wasn't I wouldn't tell you, I don't need your pity!" he stood and charged out of the Great Hall. On any other day Draco would have laughed, but having witnessed what he had in the infirmary he knew Harry was not OK by any stretch of the imagination, he pushed his plate away from him.

"I'm not hungry, I'm going to lessons early." He stood up and left ignoring Pansy and Blaise's curious expressions as well as the stares on the back of his neck, _so much for being discrete,_ he thought, but Harry was making him more curious than he had ever been before.


	4. Chapter 4

Draco strolled after the boy,

"Potter," he nodded at him, even if he was going to call him Harry in his head there was no way he was saying it out loud. Harry looked at him and then turned away,

"Look, I know you don't like me," Draco drawled, "But I swear I won't tease you any more, it's clear you're going through something, not that I care," he added quickly, "But I guess you deserve some respect, that was quite a stunt you pulled just now." Draco almost grinned remembering it, but this was still Harry, so he settled for a smirk instead,

"Shove off Malfoy," Harry mumbled, his back still turned, Draco raised an eyebrow,

"Back to last names are we?"

"W-what?" Harry stopped and his head snapped around,

"Earlier, you called me Draco,"

"I did not! What do you want Malfoy?" he growled, Draco rolled his eyes,

"Professor McGonagall asked to see us after breakfast, I thought I'd tell you before it completely slips your mind," he raised his eyebrow again, he assumed Harry would want to avoid that office.

"Not going," Harry mumbled before stalking off again, it took Draco two paces to catch him,

"Oh no Potter, I will not get into trouble because of you," he grabbed the boy by the wrist and started dragging him in the opposite direction, satisfied as Harry mewed in protest, after all, it is not every day you get to hear the saviour of the world mew.

"Peppermint toads." Draco barked at the gargoyles, he looked at Harry behind him who was focused on the hand around his wrist, "I'm going to let go now Potter, but I swear, if you run away I will hex you." He released the grip on the boys arm and surprisingly he didn't run away, he just stared at him, Draco smirked, "C'mon Potter,"

* * *

"Harry, I just don't understand, why didn't you go to your friends for help?" McGonagall pushed him, she had sent Draco out so she could speak with him alone,

"I hate the pity, I hate all the praise and everything, they all say I'm a hero and yet so many are dead! That's all I see in my dreams, all that I've lost, I don't have real friends anymore, I don't know who to trust..." he looked up realising he'd been gushing and cringed at the look of pity on his professors face.

"These dreams? They happen every night?" he nodded, "And you would try to take your life again, if I gave you the chance?" he nodded once more and at this she nodded, she flicked her wand at the door and a slightly startled Draco toppled into the room, she raised her eyebrows at him,

"It's a good thing those doors are sound proof, isn't it Harry?" Harry looked at the way Draco was blushing, head cocked to the side,

"Well Mr Malfoy, Harry here is in a bit of trouble, and it seems that he can't be trusted on his own, I am assigning you to be with him, _at all times_ seeing as you are the one who saved him. Whether or not he tells you why you are in this position is his choice." Harry looked down at the floor as Draco spluttered,

"But Professor! Surely you can't...why can't one of Potter's friends do it?" Harry cringed, he was still hurt by this rejection,

"I think Harry needs a break from his friends," McGonagall said softly. She patted Harry on the arm and sent them both on their way.

* * *

"So Potter, you gonna tell me or what?" Draco looked at Harry, who had been quiet for some few minutes now, the boy just shook his head, "Really? I'm stuck with you and I don't even get a reason? That's just pathetic." Draco grumbled,

"Look Malfoy, I don't know why the Professor put me with you, but it serves you right for saving me in the first place! I'm not going to tell you why, it's personal." Harry shoved the doors to the charms classroom open, and was greeted by a collective gasp, Draco hid his face before entering the room, it was going to be a long day,

"Draco, Draco, _Dracoooooo,_ " Pansy whispered, poking him, he whipped his head around,

"What?" he growled, scowling at the now pouting girl,

"First you're acting all Hufflepuffy, then you follow Potter out of the hall and _then_ you come into lessons with Potter? You're not _with_ him, are you?"

"No!" Draco screeched, then seeing the look from his professor lowered his voice, "No, Pansy, dear lord! It's _Potter_ for Salazar's sake, I'm just stuck with him." Draco muttered,

"C'mon Draco, you've been obsessed with Harry since first year," she pouted again,

"I have not! And since when has it been Harry?" he shoved her, and she rolled her eyes

"Since you started to like him," she muttered leaning over a piece of paper, curling her hand around it so that Draco couldn't see it, once she'd finished she looked up at her professor, when she saw he wasn't looking she whipped out her wand and charmed the paper, it rose and started floating to the other side of the room, the Gryffindor side,

"Pansy! What are you doing?" Draco watched the piece of paper land in front of Harry, he then picked it up, and after 2 agonizing minutes he looked at Pansy with wide eyes, but at the same time he was frowning, it was almost a look of mortification, he nodded and turned back to his work, Draco could see Harry's friends staring at him.

"Pansy, what did you write?" he gulped, scared of what his friend could have done, she giggled,

"You'll find out soon enough Draco!"

* * *

"Potter,"

"No,"

"Potter..."

"Shut up Malfoy,"

"Potter."

"What?"

"You're heading in the wrong direction, lunch is this way." He rolled his eyes at the stupid boy,

"I'm not going to lunch, I'm going to the library." He growled,

"Well I want lunch, and seeing as I'm not allowed to leave you..." he grabbed Harry's wrist for the second time that day and began dragging him towards the hall.

Pansy was giggling with Blaise when he got there,

"Pansy, you did _not_ tell him! It's not true!" he squeaked, sitting down,

"She told me you like him but you don't know it," Blaise grinned, then duck as an apple was thrown is his direction,

"I'm surprised you're here Draco," Pansy smiled sweetly, "I thought you'd be with Potter at the library, I guess you dragged him to lunch though,"

"W-how did you know he wanted to go to the library?"

"You'll find out, I'm telling you though, coming here will make it all the more arkward for yourself," she stood up and turned, walking through the great hall until she was by the Gryffindor's table, Draco saw her look at Harry, who looked back at her as she left the hall, once she had gone his shoulders sagged and he stood up, walking towards Draco,

"Looks like lover boy is coming," Blaise sniggered, as Draco stared at Harry, panicking,

"Look Malfoy, I'm going to the library, I swear that's where I'm going so you really don't need to follow me, but I guess, if you don't want to get in trouble..." he shrugged and walked off, Draco looked up at the table where his was subjected to a glare from the headmistress, he whimpered and stood, striding after the-boy-who-was-out-to-ruin-him.


	5. Chapter 5

"Potter!" Draco called after him, Harry sighed, he had guessed Draco was coming along, he knew that he never would have gotten a detention unless it was impossible to avoid, like in first year... Harry sighed at the memory, it had been so much easier to hate Draco, but now here they were, stuck together going to the library, to meet Pansy of all people, Harry frowned, why had he agreed?

"Potter," Draco panted catching him up, "What the hell? Aren't we supposed to avoid social contact! I probably would've followed you even if you didn't speak to me!"

"Yes, well, I assumed you wouldn't see me go, because you'd have to bother noticing me for that to happen, and really it's your fault for not letting me go to the library before lunch," Harry said sullenly, from the look on Draco's face, he had been expecting a shouting match, Harry increased his pace, so that the next few awkward moments would be shorter, as he reached the library he saw Pansy, she caught his eye and waved them over,

"No," she wagged her finger, "Not you Draco, you can wait outside, shoo!" Harry watched as Draco's jaw dropped, and Harry almost smiled, it was not an expression he thought he'd ever see on the blonds face, Draco walked away grumbling about girls and something about liking them, Harry felt his heart waver for a second, then shook his head sitting down,

"Now Harry, I just want you to know that I support you and approve of everything, but if Draco gets hurt...I'll know, OK?" she grinned, stood up and flounced out of the library, leaving a gawping Harry behind, support? Approve? Harry? He had never been so confused, that had sounded like the best friends, if you hurt them speech, but...no Pansy had just been teasing him, typical Slytherin thing to say, he stood and began to leave the library, almost bumping straight into Draco on the way out,

"So," the other boy drawled, "What did my dear sweet friend have to say?" Harry felt panic rising up his throat, he shook his head vigorously,

"Nothing! Nothing at all!" he replied franticly, he then felt a hard hand on his shoulder and looked up as Draco spun him around and slammed him into the wall,

"Potter, I did not get humiliated just now to get told that nothing happened, what did she say?" A million thoughts were running through his head about what he could do to avoid saying the truth, he sighed, dismissing them all.

"She said something about supporting and approving of me, but if you got hurt she'd know..." he looked up from his feet, and thought he saw Draco's cheeks colour, but that couldn't be right, what did he have to be embarrassed of? Harry made a gasp at freedom from this situation which could easily be turned into something much better than having Draco shout at him,

"Malfoy we're gonna be late to class,"

* * *

The rumour mill had been working over time, so Harry wasn't surprised by all the hushed tones and whispers that rippled through the room as he entered for breakfast, he walked in, not caring what they said, and sat down at the Gryffindor table, Hermione nudged him,

"We tried the best we could Harry, told them you went to duel Malfoy,"

"Why?" he said miserably, he didn't care what the rumours said, like anything anyone said affected him anymore, he heard an audible gasp from beside him,

"But you can't mean they're true Harry! They all say you're secretly dating him"

 _I wish,_ he thought, but he didn't say anything, he stood up from the table and left, if he was going to follow, Draco would.

Once he was out of the hall he let out a long sigh, he could only guess how bad the rest of the day would be.


	6. Chapter 6

Draco groaned as he walked down to the infirmary, he was pretty sure his arm was broken, and something was wrong with his stomach as well, he was covered in bruises and felt like he was dying. After he'd left Harry, in the infirmary ironically, he'd gone back to the Slytherin common room where some of his house mates had started asking questions about Harry, at first Draco hadn't said anything, it was below him, and for some reason, he couldn't bring himself to blame Harry for it, but then he had snapped, he'd jumped on them and a full scale duel had broken out, hence why he was walking in the direction he was, he looked back on the events of the past couple of days, when he thought about it, he supposed it _had_ been his fault for not listening to Harry in the first place, or possibly Pansy's for making him go to the library, and then what Pansy had said to him, well, Draco hadn't had a chance to talk to her but he definitely would, and the worst of it is Harry had no clue! Pansy had literally given him the best friend's protection speech and he had no idea! Draco shook his head, reaching the infirmary. Harry was still awake, reading off of a piece of parchment.

"Extra homework Potter?" he asked snidely, Harry looked up, startled and hurriedly folded the parchment,

"None of your business Mal-Merlin!" he yelled, Draco winced at how loud it was,

"No Potter, my name is Malfoy, Draco Malfoy," he said slowly, as if talking to a child, "You got it right the first time," but Harry was already out of bed, rushing over with a concerned expression on his face,

"What did you do?" he asked pulling Draco into the light, Draco just rolled his eyes,

"I got into a fight Potter, nothing to worry your pretty little head over," Harry was looking down but Draco could've sworn he was blushing,

"What were you fighting about," he asked, still looking down, Draco cleared his throat and gave sort of a nervous laugh,

"Oh, um the rumours..."

"Oh," Harry stepped away from him and Draco felt guilty, had he done something? Why was he even bothered? _You know why,_ something whispered in the back of his head, but then Harry hurried away in the direction of Madame Pomfrey's office,

"Wait Potter don't-"

"You came here to get help didn't you?"

"Yes,"

"Seeing as I'm not a trained healer, I think it's best if we get a _real_ mediwitch, don't you think?" he said knocking on the picture frame, the elderly witch came out looking bleary eyed and concered,

"Mr Potter? Is everything ok?" she yawned and Harry just pointed straight at him, not saying a word, Madame Pomfrey's eyes widened as she looked at him,

"Mr Malfoy! What did you do?"

10 minutes and a lot of grumbling later Madame Pomfrey headed back to bed, and Draco was situated in a hospital bed, a few away from Harry, he sighed and tried to fall asleep, he was spending the night in the same room as Gryffindor Golden Boy, how low had he sunken? Well, it wasn't like he minded to much, he couldn't say he loathed Potter anymore, there was just no friction between them, they got on pretty well all things considered, Draco smirked at the thought of getting along with him and drifted to sleep.

The screams the woke Draco were gut wrenching, screams that he'd never heard the likes of, he sat bolt up in bed gasping for air trying to recover from the shock, the screams did not stop, and they came from a few beds away,

 _Harry,_ Draco thought rushing to the boy's bed, like before, his face was twisted in agony, tears running down his face, Draco panicked, trying to shake the boy awake,

"Harry, Harry! Wake up you moron!" slowly the screams slowed and were choked off by loud uncontrollable sobbing and Draco knew Harry was awake, he climbed into the bed and pulled him up,

"That was a nightmare, wasn't it? Like the first time." He said solemnly, all he received was a whimper and more sobbing, "What happened to make you like this? What happened to my rival?" Draco demanded, pulling the face framed by dark hair towards his, the green eyes were clouded by tears, and seemed to be sunken into his face, how had he not noticed how thin Harry was? How tired he looked. Draco waited until the sobbing stopped,

"Look, P-Harry, I'm not going anywhere, nowhere at all until you tell what's going on," he stopped as Harry shook his head, then continued, "And it's not like you can avoid me cause we have to be together all the time, so, why did you try to kill yourself?" he saw Harry gulp nervously, and then he spoke,

"I-I don't think you'd get it, I don't want to tell you," he said wiping his eyes, Draco frowned,

"Is this why I'm stuck with you? Because you're suicidal," Harry nodded looking miserable, Draco shook his head, "I just don't get it, you have friends, fans, everything," _Everything I want_ he thought, but didn't say it, he had been pushed away from Harry from the beginning, do you know what it's like? To stand right behind a group of friends who are closer together then you could ever be with anyone, praised for breaking rules and doing stupid stunts, it can make you hate them, trust me. Draco's thoughts were broken by a push from Harry that nearly sent him off the bed,

"Friends who praise you for causing the deaths of so many? Fans who don't even know your middle name? No family..." he choked and stopped,

"Harry...I-" Harry just shook his head, "Tell me about the nightmare," he said trying to change the subject, not a very good change but still change,

"It's almost always the same everyone who died, the cupboard, the grave yard and then always, always at the end y-" he cut of abruptly eyes wide looking at him, Draco didn't get most of what he'd said, but he had a feeling the last bit was important,

"Go on," Draco urged, Harry just shook his head curling back into a ball and remaining silent, he sighed, "OK Harry, you sleep, remember, it doesn't do to dwell on dreams," Draco just sat there, in the dark. Harry next to me, it was getting increasingly easy to say his name, Harry, why had I never said it before? Sure he had gotten away with everything but he had problems too, Harry wasn't perfect, but he was brave, to hide this, it must have taken a lot of courage or stupidity to hold it in, but wasn't that what defined Gryffindors? Draco felt sleep taking over his body as he slumped down next to Harry, the Golden Boy was the last thing he thought about, before the dark claimed him.

 _Fuck,_ that was the first thing Draco thought as he woke up, _fuck._ He remembered the events of last night and he felt the warm body pressed against his, he had spent the whole night in a bed with _Harry Potter,_ he was torn between laughing and crying out in horror, the thought of Potter and himself in a bed, gah! He jumped out of it and looked for the time, it was close to breakfast, he wondered if he should wake Harry and then thought against, Madame Pomfrey was already awake and though she looked at him curiously, accepted his plea to have Harry stay in the infirmary that day, Draco headed down to breakfast, pleased with himself, he had gotten answers out of Harry! He burst into the great hall, only to have the smile wiped off his face at the sight of Blaise and Pansy, looking directly at him, laughing their heads off.


	7. Chapter 7

Things had changed, that was for sure. Draco had given up pretending like he and Harry weren't spending all their time together, besides, he was a lot more bearable without his...friends. After they'd started talking, sort of agreeably, Draco began to realise that it was mostly the people around Potter that gave him the qualities that Draco hated, the fans, the friendship. It was the Weasel that convinced Harry not to be friends with Draco, the Mudblood who bested him at everything. Well, he didn't forgive Harry yet but, still...

"Hey," Harry nodded in his direction, flopping down onto the bed, rocking it, Draco rolled his eyes,

"Do you have to be so dramatic Harry?" he said turning away from the paper in front of him towards the other boy, who hummed in thought,

"I'm not exactly being dramatic, I'm just tired is all," he replied looking back at him with a look of amusement,

"What?"

"It's just weird, you know? Us, in the same room, not tearing each other apart," it was, as he said rather amusing,

"Well I did think we were mature enough not to be brawling on the floor, at least I thought I was," Draco said, raising an eyebrow, Harry threw a pillow at him,

"Well, I like it anyway, it's nice," he sighed contentedly and closed his eyes, it was strange, Draco thought, that this boy who was once his rival trusted him enough to close his eyes and fall asleep in front of him, Draco wished he had that trust.

The voices that echoed down the corridor made Harry's eyes snap open, allowing Draco to see their bright green brilliance,

"Crap," Harry sat up and leaned over the edge of the bed, reaching for his bag, "If they ask where I am tell them you don't know," his voice was muffled as he pulled a cloak out his bag,

"But I'm supposed to be with you at all times!"

"They don't know that," Harry whispered before laying the cloak over himself and disappearing completely, Draco barely had time to register that Harry had an invisibility cloak before three figures walked through the door, Granger, the weasel and, Draco almost growled, the weaslette, she was Draco's least favourite, Harry's fan, friend and love interest, though he wasn't sure why the last one bothered him. They approached him with scowls on their faces, Draco made a mental note to kill Harry for making him do this,

"Where's Harry Malfoy?" Weasel snarled,

"How should I know?" Draco replied smoothly,

"Well you seem to be with him all the time so," the other Weasley said, arms folded,

"Jealous Weasley?" Draco quipped, but he could feel heat rise to his face, what must they think if they don't know why he and Harry were always together, Granger put a hand on the seething redhead's shoulder,

"We just want to know why is all Malfoy, why is Harry always with you-"

"A bloody Slytherin!" Weaselby added the mudblood silenced him,

"Why is he sleeping in the in the infirmary? Why won't he talk to us anymore? Why did he break up with Ginny?" Draco coughed as she said the last one but pushed it aside for later, he turned the cough into a laugh,

"Well, well, well, I didn't think you were _that_ stupid, you ask as if it isn't obvious! And yet I'm sure most of the school knows something about what's happened to him," he shook his head, "and you're supposed to be his friends," he smirked and them as they turned and fled the room, he sighed,

"You owe me Harry," he heard nothing, "Harry?" he grasped at the bed beside him but only came up with thing air, he stopped and listened as footsteps ran quickly away.

* * *

Harry didn't stop when he made it outside the castle, tears streaming down his face, why couldn't they leave him alone? Why couldn't they leave Draco alone? They had no reason to hate Draco, or pretend to hate him as Harry had. Harry wouldn't blame Draco when he didn't want to be around him anymore, he had seen the disgusted look on his face, yes, Draco would leave, he would go to the headmistress and beg to be free of him, he stopped by the black lake dropping the cloak and wiping his tears, looking into the inky depths he imagined how peaceful it would be just to fall in, he placed a weighting charm on himself and put the wand down, he took one last long breath, taking everything in, one last breath, for Draco, before plunging into the depths. It was oddly calming, he thought as he sank, so black...still...the right words eluded him as him mind stopped working, he closed his eyes,

Harry coughed and spluttered, he knew he shouldn't be alive, so was this heaven? His eyes focused and he saw a concerned Draco above him, ah, so it was heaven, the real Draco could never have looked so worried about him, he felt a sharp sting cross his cheek and he cried out in shock,

"Oh, good, you're not dead," a smooth voice became known to him, "If I didn't know you I'd say you weren't worth the trouble Harry." It then struck him that it was cold, was it supposed to be cold in heaven? What if, what if he wasn't dead!

"D-Draco?"

"Mmhhmm?"

"Are you...are you straddling me?" Harry could see the other boy flush as he climbed off hastily,

"Well, um, Harry, can you walk?" Harry opened his mouth to say he was fine when Draco interrupted him,

"Oh right, you just almost drowned, don't worry I'll carry you," Harry whimpered at the thought of Draco carrying him back to the castle bridal style, Draco swooped down and pulled Harry up, putting him over his shoulder in a fireman's lift, catching him by surprise, Harry huffed as Draco bounded back to the castle,

"Draco," he gasped, his voice pitching as he moved up and down, "This isn't the most comfortable of positions."

"Tough, it's the easiest," Draco replied, they spent the rest of the journey in silence. Draco dumped Harry on a bed a conjured a small fire next to them, Harry was shivering and his teeth were chattering, he saw Draco roll his eyes,

"Put some dry clothes on, honestly Harry, I'm going to change in the showers he said picking up a bundle of clothes that Harry hadn't noticed before, he walked off and Harry noticed that Draco was dripping wet, had he jumped into the lake after him? Draco puzzled him, he hated him but now they were sort of friends? And he saved Harry's life twice...he shook his head and pulled off his wet things, grabbing his usual nightwear, rather than something hospitally, he sat in front of the fire Draco had made, he really was very talented, Harry sighed. He heard light footsteps behind him, he stood up, and turned,

"Hey! Took you long enough!" but instead of a witty comeback all Harry got was wide eyes and a gaping mouth, "Draco?"

"I-I, uh, um," Harry could visibly see Draco swallowing, he clicked his fingers in front of his face and Draco seemed to snap out of the trance,

"What are you wearing!" he yelled covering his eyes, "Do you have any dignity?" Harry looked down at the shirt and boxers he was wearing,

"This is what I usually wear," Draco's eyes snapped up,

"Do you mean to tell me...I slept...we...the bed...nightmare?" Harry resisted the urge to giggle, he didn't know why Draco was in such a state, but it was hilarious,

"Draco? Shouldn't you be heading back to your dorms?" he cast a quick tempus, "Ah, maybe not, you can sleep here tonight then, a few beds away or something," Draco stood there and Harry rolled his eyes,

"Me go to bed now, you go too,"

* * *

Draco lay there paralysed in bed, why had Harry had that affect on him? To see him like that in his, boxers. He just couldn't get his head around it, every time he closed his eyes all he could see was his hair, his eyes, his mouth... he groaned, thinking of the display he'd put on earlier, what would Harry think? What was Harry thinking earlier? Draco's mind turned to the incident that could've cost his friend his life, what had set him off like that? Did his friends have such a bad impact on him? Draco mentally shook his head, no, they weren't Harry's friends. They couldn't be. Harry was his, his friend that is, Draco groaned again, why couldn't he get him out of his head!


	8. Chapter 8

"I don't know!" Draco groaned smashing his head into the table,

"Ouch," he could hear Blaise chuckling,

"Well, I can see what's happening, can't you Blaise?"

"What?" Draco hadn't told them anything, he had just come down to breakfast, with Harry as usual, but Pansy had been trying to guess why he was in a bad mood,

"We came into the infirmary this morning looking for you, and what did we find? Two dashing young boys in beds and clothes all over the floor," she wiggled her eyebrows suggestively, Draco could feel himself turning redder than the weasel's hair,

"It wasn't like that!" he spluttered, "No! You've got it all wrong! He jumped into the lake trying to drown himself! Pansy it's not like anything you're thinking of!"

"But you wanted it to be..."

"No!" more than a few Slytherins were watching now, curious as to why their Slytherin ice prince was so dishevelled, his voice cracking every other word, "No, don't be stupid Pansy, Harry and I are just good friends, and we like it that way."

"It sounds so weird coming from the guy who loathed Potter with a vengeance at the start of the year!" Blaise chuckled,

"Yeah? Well I guess I didn't know him really until the incident, actually I was thinking about telling McGonagall about the latest update..." his gaze shifted to Harry, no, he wouldn't. He knew him well enough to know Harry didn't want any more trouble, from anyone and especially not from the Gryffindor bastards. Draco had noted how Harry had sat at the opposite end of the table to his "friends" he also noticed that they were looking at him. Harry stood up to leave glancing at Draco, he looked down at his half eaten breakfast and sighed, it wasn't like he was going to eat any more anyway, Harry was already at the doors and Draco was just about to stand when he saw a group of Gryffindors following him, a growl formed in the back of his throat as he made his decision, he would let Harry handle it, but all the same...

"I'll see you later," he wasn't going to do anything, just watch, in case of an emergency or Harry's death wish.

Draco peeped round the corner at the scene playing out,

"Please Harry, I love you!" ah, so this was Weaslette trying to win him back? This was one question he needed answering, and soon.

"Lay off W-Ginny!" Draco chuckled in spite of himself, had Harry really almost used his nickname for the redhead?

"Don't speak to my sister like that!"

"Ron!"

"Hermione, c'mon! You know we're never going to get it out of him any other way! There must be something wrong with him, I bet Malfoy cursed him!"

"Leave him out of this!" Harry yelled, "You don't know him! I didn't know him..." Draco could hear the guilt in his voice and he swelled in some kind of pride, did Harry really think so much of him?

"Harry, we're just so worried about you, this isn't like you!"

"You don't know me anymore, you act like the war never happened, you forget everyone who has died!" his voice had gradually been growing louder and Draco flinched as Harry screamed the last word,

"I lost my brother you bastard! You think I could forget that!"

"You think I don't remember every day that if I had gone sooner I could have saved his life? Saved Remus and Tonks, everyone!" the weasel just snarled and left, with a moment's thought Granger went after him so that only the she-weasel remained,

"That still doesn't explain why you broke up with me Harry," she looked at him with doe eyes that made Draco gag,

"Oh," Harry said, his voice devoid of any emotion, "That, that would be because I'm gay."

* * *

Harry sat in the hospital, he had known they wouldn't understand, he could still feel the sting from the slap Ginny had hit him with. Of course it didn't help that Draco seemed to have picked a fight with one of the walls in the infirmary and was glaring at it.

"Harry?" he looked up but Draco was still staring at the wall. "You should make up with them you know,"

"What?"

"Your friends you idiot! I don't want you to lose them, just because you're friends with me." Harry scowled at his friend,

"I _have_ friends, I have Luna and Neville and George," though he said the last name as a whisper, it didn't sound right by its self. "And you're not the only reason that I...I changed my mind about them,"

"Then you should spend more time with them,"

"I _can't,_ I can't leave you and while they're more open, they still don't exactly like you." Draco didn't know how true that sentence was, Harry couldn't leave him, not in real life and he couldn't get him to leave his mind either,

"Hhmmm, yes, I guess that is somewhat an inconvenience, guess I'm kinda in your way then,"

"Don't ever say that!" Harry raised his voice and Draco's head snapped towards him, Harry blushed, biting his lip, "Don't ever say you're in the way, because you're not. You're Draco Malfoy remember? People get in your way." Draco's head was tilted to one side look at the still blushing Harry, "Don't get me wrong Draco, I really like being friends with you but it's almost Chrismas! Aren't I getting your way?" Draco just snorted,

"Don't be an idiot Harry, in fact ignore that, I know you can't help it," Harry stuck his tongue out at Draco's smirking face, "But seriously, I can't believe I'm saying this but, I enjoy your company, and it's not all the time, I still get meals with my other friends, and lessons as well, like you said, it's almost Christmas, let's enjoy it,"

And with that they fell into a routine, Draco picked Harry up in the morning, Harry would eat breakfast with Neville, they would both ignore the whispered rumours about their alleged romance, though for different reasons. It was a relief to most of the school to see their blessed hero smiling again, if he could carry on smiling then so could they. Of course Draco was the perfect bodyguard against the fangirls and everything was heading for the best.

Neither of them expected the trip to the headmistress's office.

"Professor? What's this about, why are we here?" Draco looked at her in confusion, she smiled widely,

"I've decided to release Mr Potter from your care, after all, it is Christmas Eve, and no-one should be forced to spend Christmas with anybody else, don't you think?" Draco bit his lip to stop himself protesting and just nodded, "Go and pack up your stuff Harry, you can move back to your dorm tonight, all ready for Christmas, ok?" out of the corner of his eye Draco could see Harry nod and turn towards the door, pacing out without a single word,

"Thank you Professor, Merry Christmas,"

"Um, Harry? You ok?"

"Mmmhhmm,"

"So why are you shaking?"

"Why are you still here, Malfoy?" his voice was quiet but Draco could hear the hostility in it, it sounded wrong, to hear his last name out of Harry's mouth,

"What are you on about?"

"Didn't you hear? You're free! You can go back to your friends." His voice was laced with venom that Draco hated,

"You don't have to be an ass! You know, this is why I didn't like you to begin with, what? Do you think I'm not worthy of your time?" what was making Harry like this?

"Were you just pretending to be nice?"

"I hate it when people do that! Why would you answer a question with a question? It makes no logical sense!" Draco was irrationally irritated, Merlin he was annoying and he was being bloody arrogant as well,

"If it's bugging you so much why are you here?"

"Well maybe I shouldn't be," Draco spat and left the room. Bloody _Potter._

* * *

When Draco left the room Harry let the tears trickle down his face, silently sobbing. He had realised something in McGonagall's office, the friendship he had, everything he wanted it to be, it could never happen, people would push them apart, and Draco would leave, he would always leave, everyone gets hurt, everyone leaves.

"So why should I stay?" he murmured to himself and one final plan for in his head, this time it would work, it had to work. There was no one who could stop him. Not anymore.

Harry pulled the cloak closer around him as he walked through the castle, nothing gives students the right to be out of bed after hours, it's the number one rule of Hogwarts, and Harry could see why it was, things leered up at him, he wasn't sure if it was real or his imagination. Faces he knew that began to make his eyes sting, he sped up, intent on reaching his destination. The Astronomy tower. It seemed to be getting darker as Harry climbed the many stairs of the tower, everything was so dark and he was so numb, except he was crying, so many tears warm on his face, falling down his face. He reached the edge of the tower so that only open air was in front of him. Follow his mentor down the dark dissent in front of him. He spread his arms and let one last tear fall, one last tear, for Draco.

* * *

OK, so Draco didn't have an invisibility cloak like Harry, so he shouldn't have been wandering at night, but who cares? He couldn't sleep, but that was hardly his fault! Harry was still on his mind, Draco couldn't get rid of the guilt that had settled in his stomach, what had he done? He'd just seen Harry fight with his friends, get slapped by his ex and he was all alone, Draco had walked away and left him, what kind of friend did that make him? Draco was suddenly jolted into awareness when he heard footsteps, he shrunk into the shadows and waited for whoever was there to pass, the footsteps got closer and closer but he couldn't see anyone, soon the footsteps faded and Draco stood puzzled, footsteps without a person, like the person was invisible... _Crap_ he thought racing after the footsteps, he was in a blind panic, how could he not have realised earlier? He ran hoping that his guess of where Harry was heading was right, he didn't want to go back there, of course he didn't, but to save Harry...he raced up the stairs and saw a silhouette in the moonlight arms spread, standing at the edge of the tower,

"Harry stop!" he yelled, voice cracking in panic, Harry turned and his face glistened, wet in the moonlight,

"No, not this time, there is nothing you can do to stop me," the pain in his voice was too much for Draco to bear, he strode forward and grabbed his shirt pulling him back from the edge. Their lips connected, both sets of eyes wide open, somehow Harry seemed to melt and withered to the floor when Draco let go in shock,

"Fuck, Harry I-I'm sorry I just," his bit his lip, and ran.

Harry pressed his hand over his still tingling lips, he was splayed across the floor unable to move, and he noticed something, way above him, mistletoe.

"Guess there was something you could do to stop me," he murmured, "Merry Christmas, Draco,"


	9. Chapter 9

Harry sat with his friends, trying to put a brave face on, a grin stretched across his face,

"So he's been avoiding you since Christmas?" Neville asked, a frown on his face, Harry gave a quick tense nod, aware that anyone could be watching, Luna sighed,

"How strange, but it is most obvious he loves you,"

"Luna! Don't be ridiculous, he obviously doesn't love me!" Harry hissed, "Why else would he be avoiding me?" he laced his fingers together and felt a tremor run through his body as he tried to suppress the sobs.

"Oh Harry! Don't you see, he's avoiding you _because_ he loves you!"

"She's right," Neville murmured, taking a bite of his food, Harry peered at it,

"Is that treacle tart?" he felt his mouth water as he stared and he looked around for another piece,

"See!" Neville chuckled, "You're the quirkiest person I've ever met! How could anyone _not_ love you?" Harry just rolled his eyes, and stood,

"Well, as you can see I'm so very single and with all this spare time on my hands...I think I'll go to the library," he nodded decisively, and tromped through the great hall, he could feel eyes on him and he was tempted to put on a show for them, maybe a bit of ballet, or even better, yell something about trolls. He rolled his eyes and closed the door behind him, okay, so he wasn't really going to the library, books were nice and all but, just not his idea of a good time, walking up to his room he pulled out a long case, pulled back the latches and threw back the lid.

"Hello, old friend." He almost cooed stroking the wooded handle,

* * *

Draco picked at his meal, always aware of the presence on the other side of the hall,

"Sooooo, conversation starters huh?" Pansy drawled, he could tell that not only was she bored, but very, very mad at him. He hadn't told her anything about what had happened, Christmas Eve and onwards.

"Look, I know you're pissed, but it's my life, not yours," she glared at him,

"Well I get that, but how can I help you if you don't tell me?"

"I don't need help." She rolled her eyes and sunk back into silence, maybe he should tell her, but. The kiss felt too private to share and the day after...Harry must hate him, why would he have wanted that kiss? After all Draco had done. He remember how he came up to him that day,

"Draco, I...I wanted to talk to you." There was a faint blush on Harry's cheeks, he must be so embarrassed by me,

"Don't worry I can guess what you're going to say, so I'll say first, I'm sorry, that kiss meant nothing, and I'm glad that you didn't die, but that's it ok?"

"Oh, right, I see. So I guess I should just go?" Draco bit his lip, he sounded so relieved, the pang in his chest was like nothing he'd ever felt before. He watched Harry walk away, and he felt his eyes prickle for the first time in a long time.

"I'll see you guys around ok?" he got up and left the table.

As Draco walked down the halls, he could almost feel someone following him, he turned and was greeted by a bright haired Gryffindor,

"Weasley!" he growled, "What do you want?"

"Easy, easy!" she took a step back, "I come in peace,"

"Then wha-" she cut him off,

"It's about Harry." She bit her lip, looking at him warily,

"What about him? He's yours isn't he?" I asked, willing my voice not to break,

"You really don't get it do you? He doesn't want me! I mean when I found out he was gay, I reacted badly sure, but I never meant to lash out like I did, I just never really got taught about it you know? So I don't really know what to think about it. I was worried he'd been leading me on for all those years and I was mad. But then I calmed down, and I realised, I just want him to be happy. And then, because I'm not stupid, I figured it all out, why you two were spending so much time together, and I didn't want him to die! And then when you were separated, I put two and two together and I realised, it's you!" she panted, Draco's eyes were wide trying to process her rant, "You're the one he wants," I couldn't ignore the sadness in her voice, but it was drowned out by my shock.

"Harry, wants...me?" as each word slipped through my lips, I began to feel hope course through me, and then the Weaslette wacked me round the back of the head.

"GO!"

* * *

Harry wondered if he could just travel the world on his broomstick, visit all the magical places he'd never been to. Nothing felt quite as right as riding his broom. It felt like he had been trapped in a box all year, and now he was finally set free. He yelled into the wind, pushing as fast as he could go. Then he spotted the figure on the ground, why would Draco want to talk to him? Why now? He'd made it very clear that he didn't like Harry in the slightest. Despite all this Harry found his broom slowly gravitating towards the blond head and the perfect face that was now looking up at him. Draco had his hand shoved in his pockets and his shoulders hunched forward,

"Draco?" Harry called out his name cautiously, "What-"

"I'm sorry!" Draco yelled cutting him off, Harry could see the tears in his eyes, "I'm sorry, I'd just assumed that you didn't l- feel the same way, and I was scared, I've never felt like this before. I'll understand if you don't, but I just wanted to say, I lied earlier, that kiss meant everything to me."

"I...you...what?" Harry starred, he had just started to come to terms that he would never have Draco and here, he took a step back and Harry realised he was taking too long to answer, "No! Draco wait, how can you not see this! I care about you! You're one of the only people I care about now, if it weren't for you I-" he shook his head, "I love you." Draco stared at him and Harry could see the blush on his cheeks,

"I um I, I l-" he stuttered and then he growled, taking the end of Harry's broom and twisting it so that their faces were directly in line, except Harry was upside down. Draco surged forward and captured Harry's lips with his own, the kiss was hard, filled with a suppressed passion. Harry moaned as Draco's tongue swept across his lips, allowing him access. It was all Harry could do to hold. As the boys apart they panted, Draco's hands still on Harry's face,

"I love you too." It was barely a whisper on his lips,

"Better than Spiderman." Harry murmured a grin spreading across his face,

"What's Spiderman?" Harry laughed then, and soon both of them were in hysterics. A thought on Harry's mind made him move closer,

 _One more kiss,_

 _One for Draco_

 _Okay maybe a few more than one._

 **A/N: Okay, first things first feel free to skip this bit, personally I find author's notes really tedious. This is the last chapter for One for Draco and I really struggle believing over 1,500 people have seen it! Thanks so much to everyone who left a review or followed this story. If you want more, please leave a review for me. Thanks!**


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